Going dutch while dating 2getherdating
"You ain't gotta be rich, but fuck that, how we gonna get around on your bus pass?
" asks Amil on "Can I Get A," a classic Jay Z collaboration about personal finance.
And as long as I am on the market, I will never, ever pay for a first day–ever!
My feelings are that a woman has to have standards and boundaries.
However, going dutch, or heck, even paying for a first date, ain’t one of them.
In fact, I have never in my 35 years–15 plus years of those spent dating–ever, and I mean ever, had a man try to split a tab with me on the first date.
While I don't know that bus passes are something that most people concern themselves with this side of the last Clinton administration, the general sentiment hasn't changed: when you're dating, somebody should be footing the bill for both of you.
I've seen some absolute RANTS from guys online about women just going out with them for the free meal — this is on their DATING PROFILES, by the way — and that the woman should expect to pay for her own drinks.
But even then, I would’ve never considered telling him “you pay for your own food”, nor would he have asked me to do it either (and never has). To each their own, but I can’t think of any good to come out of a practice like this.
When I go out with my girlfriends or even some family members, we’ll split the bill and pay for our respective meals. Now, hubby and I do each have a separate bank account, but just about all of our money goes into our joint account.
Honestly, are there women out there who will go out with a guy just for the free drinks? But if a guy really expects that he can spend money on a woman and she'll keep going out with him, or that he ‘deserves’ something from her, that's f'ed up," says Diana, 36.
You just don't show up to a date expecting a free meal; you just don't."I think it shouldn't be assumed that he is going to pay.
However, as one responder pointed out, expecting the man to pay on a date makes sense because of that pesky ol' wage gap, which was definitely an interesting stance to take. Because it's awkward to be like, ' I would really like to go on that fancy date you asked me on, but I don't have money to pay my half or something.' But then once you hit past three dates, it's fair to start splitting the bill, unless it's a special occasion or something," says Sabrina, 27."First date? If a guy is definitely the one pursuing me and on the first date we're having a decent time and he tries to go dutch ...